Dumb Mistake #6- "Not Realizing God's Kingdom is Bigger than You (and your Ministry)

I once asked a college minister known for having a heart for discipleship to lead a seminar on that topic for a state conference for university students. The timing seemed perfect, because I knew he would be in town that weekend for a ballgame involving his school. He declined--because he said he thought few, if any, of the students from his ministry would be attending the conference.

Are you building God's kingdom or yours? Sometimes, that is a tough and uncomfortable question to answer honestly. Each of us is responsible to his or her employer. But if God has called you to college ministry, he has called you to build His kingdom--not just your campus or church ministry.

Do you think about what is best for college ministry as a whole or just yours? What have you done lately that helps--not hurts---other ministries to college students?

No particular ministry is a fit for every student. So if you are "the big show" on your campus or in your town, how can you benefit others who might touch students you would never reach? What can you do to help college ministry in your whole state or nationally? You might be surprised!

# 7: “Not Loving College Students”

That is crazy you say, “I wouldn’t be in college ministry, if I didn’t love students!”

But, is your love conditional? Do you love them whether or not they participate in your ministry or always do right?

College students sometimes act selfish, immature and disloyal. One of our fine arts teams had been in a church one weekend. After they had returned, I heard thru the grapevine that they had been a little hard to deal with—especially with the man who had done the sound. I got his number and called to apologize.

He was wonderful. He said, “Hey, they’re college kids and I don’t expect them to have it all together yet. I didn’t act just right when I was their age.”

Wow! The guy had never been to Seminary and he knew a lot about doing college ministry. There is a student that my wife and I had in our home and fed meals to. A year or so later he dropped out of our ministry and when I would see him on campus he would not speak to me or pretend he did not see me. I had to remind myself he still needed me to love him.

Yesterday was a very busy day in our office. Reports were due. A big newsletter was in process and behind on assembly, a grad student involved some with our program came in alarmed. She was flying to her home for a long holiday weekend. The student who was to drive her 75 miles to the airport had called with a lame excuse. One of us remembered that our job is to love college students and dropped everything to drive her to the airport.

Are you doing your ministry or are you also loving college students in spite of them?

#8 "Trying To Go it Alone"

If we believe the Bible that we teach and preach, we know God created us to need each other. But, a common mistake in college ministry is attempting to "go it alone" or feeling alone.

Those that work on campus are not teachers, administrators or church staff members. Perhaps, you like me, have been asked, "Do you think you will ever get your own church?" But, part of our aloneness can come from the all consuming nature of our work---you never get done. But, all of us need someone (besides our spouse) who thinks we matter and with which we can celebrate successes and share frustrations. Be honest now. Do you have some friends who are not college students?

Try these suggestions:

-Have a standing weekly lunch date with someone you like and who at least acts like the feeling might be mutual.

-Play bad golf. My first golf game came after going to the Hock shop and saying, "I will take that shiny set of clubs."

You meet really interesting characters and you can even play alone---which still just beats working all the time.

-Have a friend who is in college ministry in another city or state and you can call each other and laugh and cry together. I have a friend in another state with which I talk as often as two or three times a week. He may be crazier than I am!

Remember: If you try to go it alone in college ministry, you have a fool for a friend!

Arliss Dickerson

# 9 “Trying to make your students just like you”

This is such a subtle temptation that we sometimes don’t realize we are doing it. And anyway, what’s wrong with it---given that all college ministers are spectacular creations of God.

Have you ever noticed that most students go to the seminary from which their college minister graduated or currently favors? This is an example of how we tend to shape our students to our mold without realizing it. One of the basic teachings of scripture is the idea that we are made differently and God wants to use us differently.

Are you limiting your ministry to those who want to be just like you?

When you meet with individuals to train or disciple them, do you stick to a list of things you want to teach them, or do they get to talk about their issues and needs?

Look around your ministry. How similar are your students in thought, style and gifts? Could it be that YOU are the problem?

#10 "Not Defining Success"

How do you measure your own success. Obviously, the people you work for have expectations and keeping your job is some measure of success. But, what keeps you coming back. How do you know you are doing your job?

It seems there are five (5) elements that should go into your own formula for defining success. They are:

1. EXPECTATIONS: What do those who hire and pay you expect? Do you have a clear understanding of the stated and assumed expectations?

2. CAMPUS OR CHURCH SETTING: All campuses and churches are different. Comparing yourself to others can be very frustrating when it is an apples to oranges comparison.

Your situation determines what you can and cannot do.

3. PERSONAL GIFTS/STRENGTHS: The New Testament clearly teaches that God has made us to be different and wants to use us that way. Are you playing to your strengths and utilizing them to the fullest?

4. RESOURCES: Do you operate out of a large church, a backpack, a BCM Center or a broom closet? Do you have a significant budget, a staff, or what? Your resources must be a part of defining YOUR definition of success.

5. SATISFACTION/HOT BUTTON ISSUES: Satisfaction is in many ways more important than success. What do YOU have to do to be satisfied with your work and feel like it is worth doing. No one can answer that questions but you.

Use these 5 ingredients to figure your "success formula".

This is such a subtle temptation that we sometimes don’t realize we are doing it. And anyway, what’s wrong with it---given that all college ministers are spectacular creations of God.

Have you ever noticed that most students go to the seminary from which their college minister graduated or currently favors? This is an example of how we tend to shape our students to our mold without realizing it. One of the basic teachings of scripture is the idea that we are made differently and God wants to use us differently.

Are you limiting your ministry to those who want to be just like you?

When you meet with individuals to train or disciple them, do you stick to a list of things you want to teach them, or do they get to talk about their issues and needs?

Look around your ministry. How similar are your students in thought, style and gifts? Could it be that YOU are the problem?